There have been lots of Hannah posts, so I thought I would share a bit of what has been going on in my heart recently. Many of you have asked me, how I'm doing, and I appreciate that. (Moms, you know sometimes how little attention you can get once the baby arrives:-O!) For the longest time, my answer has been "I'm struggling with staying at home more than I thought I would." Yet, the past week or so, God has really begun to change my mindset.
What did I miss? I missed my identity as a paycheck receiving, competent event planner/organizer/administrator, who benefitted greatly from the compliments given her by her boss and others. I missed being able to answer people's question of "what do you do?" with a professional description of ministry events that wouldn't have happened with out me (or so I liked to think). I missed feeling "good enough" by everyone else's standards.
So, what has God done? He has reminded me that this time I have been given is a gift. I have been able to slow down and smell the roses (and many diapers :-P). I have been able to watch my daughter grow and change, learning new things just about every day. I have been able to open my life to an awesome high schooler, to visit with other incredible moms and babies, to spend evenings and weekends with my husband instead of a rushed list of chores, and to trust God with our finances and watching Him provide again and again. God reminded me that my little girl will not be little forever and He has given me this time as a gift. Sure, my days are not necessarily glamorous, but I vaguely recall that my days in the paycheck workforce weren't one shining moment after another. Thank you, Lord, for helping me to treasure my gift while I have it.
2 comments:
Good post Dana. I am struggling with the same stuff right now, except instead of a child, it's just me and the seemingly never-ending language studies. It's been a good support to Stefan to have the house functioning without him and just there to welcome him after work-stress, but I feel a little batty at times just doing German-German-German grammar every morning with kitchen mess in the afternoon! Thanks for being open and sharing how it's going with you. =)
Amen! I hope that I get to stay at home when Jim and I have a child. Thank you for being so transparent. I'm so glad that you're my friend!
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